First Day's Change

I walked in there fumbling all over the place prepared for battle. I didn’t care who had something to say I would like to have think that I was more than prepared for the worse they had to say on this lonesome day. No matter how many people surrounded me it would still be lonesome I knew. I came in grabbed my schedule and headed to the second floor standing tall, confident, and happy however I knew how I really looked to those people; coffee stained teeth, greasy hair, shiny forehead, and crusty knee caps from what little  I was showing. I passed the lockers to see the various names on small yellow post-it notes, mine appearing to have last named first Kareen, Molly. I turned right only to notice that this was my stop room 254. I walked in the classroom books held tightly to my chest almost feeling as if they were my protection now from the glares of my past encounters. She told me my name was listed on one of the back desks. I stood up straight in my seat like I had been practicing all summer for this day. I wondered why the room felt so different…no, not the room why did I feel different.  It wasn’t as if this was even a new place for me I had been going there since seventh grade but now it felt as if the rules of life and my sudden thoughts on it had changed. My smile was brighter, my laugh was genuinely jubilant, and the hatred in my heart had dug so deep down inside I couldn’t tell where I buried it in the first place.