Dont make me smile now....or ill talk to you

I guess you could say that they had a reason to be wary of me. I mean it’s not every day that you see someone smile for no reason up and down the halls, who doesn’t have a boyfriend, isn’t in love, doesn’t have an evil scheme, and has never won anything in her life time. It must’ve seemed suspicious however it was just me. a very smiley person. Some people may say I’m lunatic like, or bipolar just because the strange outburst of excitement and love or the sporadic  anger that rises from within choking me until I say the worst things to that person that have been on my mind all along. And just so you know I always have ammo. If they ever make a machine or someone who can read people’s minds then you would see that things I do are completely logical to me and the rest of the world. Almost like the time I went to Gabe’s and told the cashier that it was completely inappropriate that they were selling lingerie in the back to school department. Does that make sense? We don’t want our children to be whores. Girls these days are just throwing themselves around with anyone and everyone. Well if you would have gotten them some good old granny panties instead of see through draws maybe then there would be less HIV, herpes, aids, and sixteen and pregnant tv shows. The cashier understood my reasoning behind it all and surely I did not get those see through panties. Maybe I shouldn’t be discussing things like this at my age as if I were an old folk seeing what was wrong with the world but our generation is failing. We’ve become so numb to everything going on around us that now we take EVERYTHING as a joke. For my sake they were joking around about children in Africa having their villages burned down and the young men had to kill their families at gun point some even at the youngest of 8 or 9 years old. Its gruesome. Why do I care though? That’s what people ask me all the time and it makes me so angry because all I can think about is that could be you tomorrow. There is going to come a time where the world will be dark, viscous, and almost unrecognizable as a place we call home. Will they be laughing then when they have to shoot their mothers and fathers to save themselves? Wow, I’m sorry I just get so emotional when it comes to that sort of thing. I hate the people who say things like ‘nobody cares if you’re adopted stop complaining’ or ‘who cares if they’re hungry what about me’. it makes me want to, hurt others. People are just so cruel nowadays then we have teens killing themselves! I’m just like in shock of how many people taking their own lives based upon others, It’s so sad what we’ve come to. But I really do hope someday I can help but not like lets raise money for the kids in Africa but let’s make the world genuinely happy. oh you don’t even know. Seeing a smile to me is like the biggest gift in the world. Seeing people happy makes me happy that’s it. Not money, not guys, just true happiness, the kind of happiness that comes from the heart and not the mind. This is the kind of happiness that glows from within, seeping out of your skin pouring onto others like me. A true smile, there is nothing like it.